I have been told by some that I need to "get over" the tragedies I've faced, that I need to forget about everything that has happened and move on with my life. Do these folks really know what they are asking me to do? Would they want to forget about the things which have meant the most to them in their life?
I certainly don't want to "get over" or forget my husband Eddie. We were married for 33 years before his death on Valentine's Day 2007. If I forget him, I lose all the memories of the time we spent together, of the silly things we did, of the love we had for each other, the life we built together. I would have to forget our two precious daughters who gave us so much joy (and a smidgen of grief at times too). Because of Eddie I am the person I am today! He taught me all about love and happiness and living!
I don't want to forget the business that we worked so hard to build. The business that provided for us all those things that help us to enjoy life.
I don't want to forget the 2 houses that love built. One where we raised our children and the other that he built for us to live in our old age.
If I forget all the terrible things that have happened, I would have to forget the beautiful memories of my parents: my dad who passed on June 30, 2009 and my mom who left this world on August 31, 2010. Believe me, being the middle child of 5 had its ups and downs, but I wouldn't trade it for anything! We didn't have much money, but we had all those things money couldn't buy-love, respect, and lots of hugs and kisses.
And I would have to forget my sister-in-law who was tragically killed in an accident a year ago. I learned a lot about kindness and forgiveness from her. I don't want to forget that.
"Get over" it? Absolutely not! But move on? Yes! I never want to forget those I've lost-they have helped to shape me into the person I am. Because of the things I learned from them and because of the memories I have, I am moving on. But I will never "get over" it.